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- Why does saying "No" feel like an apology in your head?
Why does saying "No" feel like an apology in your head?
Sallyann Della Casa
January 15, 2026 • Estimated Reading Time: 11 minutes
Welcome back, Lovely Human,
Most of us don’t actually say “No.” We say, “Let me check”, “I’ll see what I can do”, or the most dangerous phrase of all: “Sure, happy to.” Not because we are happy. But because we are afraid of the friction a clean “No” might create.
Somewhere along the way, “No” became a character flaw instead of a leadership skill. We were taught explicitly or quietly that being agreeable is safer than being sovereign. That clarity is rude. That boundaries need cushioning. So we pad our refusals with explanations, justifications, and unnecessary guilt, until our “No” sounds like a small apology for taking up space.
Here’s the uncomfortable truth I see again and again in the data at GLEAC: The people who struggle most with saying “No” are often the ones carrying the most responsibility. They confuse availability with value. They mistake being needed for being effective. And slowly, almost invisibly, their calendar becomes a map of everyone else’s priorities.
But leadership isn’t about saying “Yes” to everything that asks for you. It’s about having the courage to protect what actually matters i.e. your energy, your focus, your health, your integrity. A clear “No” isn’t rejection. It’s direction.
So the real question isn’t who you’re disappointing when you say “No.”
It’s whether the person you keep betraying is yourself.
A “No” that needs explaining isn’t a boundary.
Availability is not the same as value.
Every unspoken “No” costs you something.
🎙️ I'm so excited to launch to you all our January Unstructured Labs for 2026. Our events are only open to our community.
Community members join all 12 labs this year for $500/year , plus 3 months of dedicated networking, earnings and marketing coaching with your own AI agent and our team. Otherwise, each lab is $50 (register and we will send you the payment link).
🤖 What is the latest news in AI & Emerging Tech?
1 - Humanoid Robots at the Border
China is deploying humanoid robots at the Vietnam border to manage passengers, monitor crowds, and inspect cargo, one of the first real-world law enforcement uses of humanoids.
2 - OpenAI × Jony Ive: The AI Pen Era
OpenAI is reportedly building its first hardware product with Jony Ive: a screenless, audio-first AI pen designed to work alongside your phone and computer.
3 - AI’s Trillion-Dollar Opportunity: Context Graphs
AI startups are shifting focus from raw outputs to context graphs—capturing the “why” behind decisions, not just the “what.”
4 - Comet Browser: AI as Your Research Assistant
Perplexity’s new Comet browser acts like a built-in AI assistant—automating research, analysis, and workflows as you browse.
5 - Viral Content, Engineered
Tools like Poppy.ai promise to help creators generate viral-ready scripts and ads in minutes, not hours.
📚 How Can I Stay Ahead in Learning & Development?
1 - Europe’s Economic Stress Test
Christine Lagarde reflects on navigating Europe’s overlapping economic crises—from inflation to fragmentation—through a leadership lens.
2 - Jobs on the Rise: 2026
LinkedIn’s latest data reveals the 25 fastest-growing roles in the U.S., offering a clear signal of where skills demand is actually moving.
3 - The 20-Hour CEO
If your business can’t run without you, you don’t own a company—you own a very demanding job.
4 - 9 Habits of Happy Retirees
This book distills research-backed habits that shape fulfillment after full-time work ends.
🎙️ Who’s Attending Davos? Connect with other Lovely Humans!
Several members from our community, including lovely human, Audrey, will be in Davos—because conversations matter more than panels. If you’re attending, let us know here and we’ll connect you!
💡 How Do I Broaden my Global Worldview? Zoroastrianism
Before anything sacred happens, something ordinary does.
Hands are washed.
Floors are swept.
Water is handled carefully.
Fire is kept clean.
In Zoroastrian homes and temples, cleanliness is not a metaphor. It is maintenance practiced for thousands of years.
This is unusual in a world that often treats ethics as abstract and optional.
Here, morality shows up in the physical world.
What you touch matters.
What you contaminate matters.
What you neglect spreads.
These practices weren’t designed to look virtuous.
They were designed to protect what sustains life.
Care becomes a way of staying grounded when things feel unstable.
In modern life, we often separate values from action.
We discuss ethics while outsourcing responsibility.
This tradition never made that split.
It assumed that how you care for the world is how you care for the future.
Guiding question:
When life feels chaotic, what practices help you stay responsible rather than reactive?
🍀 What Can I Do to Impact, Live Sustainably and Make the World a Better Place?
1 - When Faith Meets Climate Action
In Indonesia, environmental protection is being framed as a religious duty, mobilising communities to care for land, forests, and water.
A reminder that culture—not policy alone—often drives lasting change.
2 - Giving at Scale
Bill Gates has transferred $7.9 billion to a nonprofit led by Melinda French Gates—one of the largest single charitable donations ever recorded.
Not just a headline number, but a signal of where long-term impact capital is being placed.
3 - Joy as Sustainability
Goat yoga, cow cuddling, and outdoor rituals may look playful—but they reconnect humans to nature in simple, grounding ways.
Sustainability sometimes starts with remembering what we’re protecting.
From Community to Carbon Impact
As a community, we’ve already planted 680 trees through the #GLEACMafia forest —creating a measurable carbon-offset baseline for what comes next.
Small, consistent actions compound faster than grand promises.
If you’ve completed any of the impact action to plant your own and haven’t received your tree. Feel out this form
✨ Lovely Human Guest Writer of the Month
Jenson Goh — Singapore
A systems thinker with a storyteller’s instinct.
This week, Jenson reflects that not all leadership progress shows up on the surface. This piece reflects on the bamboo principle — how real growth often happens quietly, through patience, accumulation, and unseen groundwork long before results appear. In a world that rewards speed and visible wins, it’s a gentle reminder that what looks like “nothing happening” may actually be the most important phase of all.
Your fans,
— Sal & the Gleac team
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